You’re probably the single happiest soul I have ever known. You treat happiness like it’s a priority and made countless successful attempts on setting aside all the negativity that’s put around you. I hope you know that you are doing a great job of trying to not listen to what others have to say about the way you look right now, because to me, you’re killing it.
Not to spoil you or anything, for I know you hate spoilers, but there will come a time in your life where all of this, all of which society has told you, will turn real. You will encounter millions of hate comments and insults coming from the people whom you’d least expected the most. This person will tear you apart, yet put you back in one piece, but then rip your heart again once more like it’s never going to end. Over and over again. You’ll finally take a turn and create drastic changes towards your current mindset for that time being. Happiness was just not your thing anymore. All you wanted then was to loose those few harmless kilograms of weight that once never bothered your confident ass self. You’ll feel extremely insecure and scared of what people might say and think about you.
Aside from that, there will be times where you will experience new emotions. Such emotions will take you so high above the clouds, but will then eventually drop you back down, because it figured that you weren’t ready enough to fly. The fall will be painful. Your heart will ache so much that you’ll have no choice but to let them out through the endless tears you’ll be crying then. But that happens. They weren’t lying when they said everything will turn okay in the end. Time heals.
There is no need to worry about having regrets. Although, more often than not, that’s what you’re going to go through for the next several months to come. But trust me, everything happened because it had to. Go back to Him, tell Him what you need. Seek for His presence, and you will soon understand how powerful the meaning of redemption, forgiveness, and cleanse are to your mistakes. He will guide you back on track, He always does. Just so you wait.
There will be times where you’ll find happiness again, but in a much more different way than you’d normally experience. I hope you learn to appreciate this one, for it may not stay longer than you’d want it to.
The growth you’ll experience is unbelievable. The choices you make won’t always satisfy. You will learn a great deal of new things. You will travel. You will acquire the friends that would help get you back up. You will laugh so hard to the point where your stomach hurts. You will find yourself reading books that open your mind up to so many new things. You will work with the people you’d never expected to work with. You will succeed. And then fail some more. You will cry. You will find something you’re really passionate about and then end up sticking to it. You will learn to appreciate the time you spend with your family, and you will of course, grow some more until then.
So right now, you’re on your way towards becoming the person you’ve always wanted to be. The best version of it. Therefore, there should be a long overdue process going on over there, alright. You’ll get there. Take my word for it, will you? Keep doing what you do best, and don’t ever stop yourself from doing it. It might get you places. For, who knows, right?
“May the space between where I am, and where I want to be, inspire me.”
I love you and I’ll see you in a couple,
I apologize for this post being quite personal. I hope you guys would still give me feedback on this one? Tell me if I made actual sense from writing these types of letters to my 15-year-old self. Then again, I have posted this way back in December, but decided to delete it because to tell you the truth, I was quite embarrassed by the content written inside of it. So now that I decided to finally do a repost, there were of course, several tweaks here and there made for the better sake of it being (hopefully) less ambiguous. Thanks again for reading! 🙂